The practice to handle desire

To confront desire, there are two practices: 1) of the relative truth; 2) of the ultimate truth.

Practice of the relative truth

There are two methods: contemplation on the impurity of the body and contemplation on impermanence.

1. Contemplation on the impurity of the body

There is quite a selection of teachings on this method in the Theravada tradition, which offer ways to restrain desire. Here is a simple explanation of this practice.

First, calm your mind and then contemplate: The root of all the pain that I feel from a failed relationship is nothing but desire. My desire for the other person makes me suffer; without this desire, I won’t be so heartbroken. It is actually my mind that’s making me suffer. I am the one who hurts me the most, not somebody else.

~ Depicted from "THE HANDBOOK FOR LIFE"S JOURNEY : On The Three Poisons - How to Handle Desire"

Many people think wealth is the answer to happiness. However, after acquiring wealth, they often do not experience the happiness they imagine. In the period from the 1950’s up to the year 2000, income in the West increased threefold, but people’s well-being actually declined. A lot of psychologists, sociologists, and economists have studied this phenomenon over a half century and have concluded: when our annual income is around forty thousand US dollars, money brings a sense of security, which in turn leads to sense of well-being; when annual income exceeds this amount, there is no longer a connection between money and happiness. Thus, having more wealth is no guarantee of happiness.

~ Depicted from THE PAPER TIGER - The Tibetan Buddhist View on Happiness

Every Tibetan Buddhist tradition contains practices of the chöd sadhana，a very special practice that can be separated into many types. The Words of my Perfect Teacher mentions a preliminary practice called the Kusali Chöd. In this practice, you imagine offering your body as a sacrifice to KuntuZangpo and giving it to all types of spirits, and so forth. The real practice of chöd is to use the wisdom of realizing emptiness in a special technique to remove stubbornness and troubling thoughts. The premise of this practice is that you must realize emptiness and let this enlightenment experience strong. After a certain time, you can meditate in areas where ghosts are rumored to appear. During such times there are usually activities that gather spirits, and you might hear strange sounds or witness odd occurrences. This would make ordinary people very nervous and their self-attachment would be very obvious. At this time if you can focus on emptiness, you will be able to remove your self-attachment successfully, and at the same time remove fear and other negative emotions.

~ Depicted from Luminous Wisdom Book Series 10

How should it be applied? Here is an example from the Mahayana Abhidharma Sangiti Shastra. Three people were having a meal together. One of them thought, “I’m going to steal something (or kill some animals) after my meal.” Another thought, “I’m going to help releasing some animals (or do prostrations) afterward.” The third person thought, “I just want to fill my empty stomach; nothing else is planned afterward.”

They were all having a meal, but because each had a different purpose of eating, the same action resulted in three different kinds of karma. Eating, in the case of the one who wanted to kill and steal afterward, was doing evil; good karma for the one who wanted to do beneficial things afterward, which surely will bring good rewards in the future; neutral effect for the one who just wanted to fill the stomach, an ordinary daily activity that would not have any particular consequences. They were doing neither good nor bad things when having a meal. However, different motivations ended up causing three different results. It shows just how crucial motivation is.

~ Depicted from THE RIGHT VIEW - The Three Supreme Methods—the ultimate methods of cultivating virtue and training the mind

Attachment to a person can be handled the same way. For instance, when one is going through the painful situation of falling out of love, one can visualize the other person in the front and reflect calmly: Is he or she really as lovable as I imagined? Why do I like him or her so much? Is it his or her looks, talent, money, power, fame that I like or something else?

~ Depicted from "THE HANDBOOK FOR LIFE"S JOURNEY : On The Three Poisons - How to Handle Desire"

Second, do not be vain. The more we indulge in vanity, the more likely we are to feel empty and worthless. At the end of the vicious cycle, we can only fill our emptiness with more vanity. This feeling is one of immeasurable suffering. A lot of very wealthy people find that they would rather die than live because they feel empty inside; their wealth cannot be counted on in any way to bring happiness.

~ Depicted from THE PAPER TIGER - The Tibetan Buddhist View on Happiness

Not only in the dharma practice, but in all undertakings including before starting a business, we should pray to Guru Padmasambhava and recite the heart mantra. This is very helpful. Guru Padmasambhava is the embodiment all the buddhas and bodhisattvas: in other words, Guru Padmasambhava encompasses the blessings and merits of all the buddhas and bodhisattvas. I would like to propose all of you to read the biography of Guru Padmasambhava, to understand the merits of Guru Padmasambhava.  Through this, you will be easily develop confidence in him.

~ Depicted from Luminous Wisdom Book Series 10

The point is that Buddhist teachings are not just some stuff for casual conversation, nor should they be studied as cultural or academic subject. They ought to be applied in managing our daily life.

~ Depicted from THE RIGHT VIEW - The Three Supreme Methods—the ultimate methods of cultivating virtue and training the mind

Although some products can really make life easier and are indispensable in some cases, whether they are name brand products is very often a matter of face or vanity, not necessity. When dealing with the issue of not losing face, it is important to keep a close watch on irrational ideas.

~ Depicted from "THE HANDBOOK FOR LIFE"S JOURNEY : On The Three Poisons - How to Handle Desire"